The Down and Dirty Truth about Marriage: My Best Friend

The interesting thing about our relationship is that after that first "he picked the other girl" hooplah, I only remember Josh as part of my life. I don't remember a lot about how our relationship progressed. We were sixteen - still so, so young, still learning so, so many things. Sometimes I wonder if our attending different schools in those early days is what wove us together so tightly. We never grew weary of each other because we weren't together all day. We wrote one another notes at least every day, which we would deliver at church on Wednesday nights.We talked on the phone nearly every night.  It was simple and pure, really - we just dove head long in knowing each other - not because we knew to intentionally do that in a budding relationship - but because we liked talking to each other. I was a big Josh fan, and he was a big Emily fan. This, I think, is the beauty of high school sweethearts. We grew up together and learned one another as we went. We didn't try to analyze where the relationship was going or what the future held. We liked each other, and that's all there was to it.

A few weeks after we began officially dating, we took a weekend trip out to Toledo Bend to stay at our friend, Leigh's, lake house. It was an annual thing, and it was the most fun. The girls slept upstairs in the loft area while the boys slept downstairs on the living room floor. Yes, we all actually slept in our assigned spots. We spent our days walking the beach, throwing the frisbee, playing board games, laughing until we cried, eating all the food, and napping as much as we wanted. We spent our evenings eating more and sitting around a campfire. We talked and laughed and laid a lifetime foundation, without even realizing what we were doing, for what friendship should look like. 

On this particular trip, while the boys were sitting around the campfire and the girls were snacking in the kitchen (let it be said that teenage girls eat every bit as much as boys!), Josh and I stole away to the dock. I'd been waiting as patiently as possible for that first kiss. Have I mentioned that I was really into Josh? And also that I really liked boys in general? And, for the love of the land, I really wanted this particular boy to lay one on me?

This was a foreshadowing, just like everything else, of the way I run ahead like a crazed maniac shouting wildly, "Hurry up! Let's get on with it already! Patience is for the birds!" To this day, I leap without looking and lay dead down on the rocks below while Josh is still analyzing the path behind me, taking his time, cautiously observing each step. We are in a constant pull against one another, and while this can be infuriating for both of us, it also saves us both from either never experiencing anything or...lying dead on the rocks. 

We stood on the dock, looking out over Toledo Bend, the moon blanketing us in vague, shimmering light and the cool Louisiana fall air casting a vague dampness over our skin and hair, making us shiver and shove our hands in our pockets. (Yes, it is exactly that romantic in my sixteen-year-old memories...whether it was ACTUALLY that romantic is pretty much irrelevant.) We talked and talked - standing looking out over the water, sitting criss cross applesauce on the ground, lying side by side on our backs - good grief alive will this boy ever kiss me? - and then silence. He reached over, turned my head toward his, and kissed me...short, simple, sweet. All the butterflies, y'all. All of 'em flying all over the place. I could've stayed there all night until, approximately 2 seconds after we kissed, Josh, "Okay! You ready to go back?" That was that. Homeboy had done what he set out to do. He walked back to the fire to tout his victory to his friends so that they could acknowledge it shortly and move on to more important topics like sports stats or the latest guitar chord they'd learned. I, however, walked inside to be greeted by gushing and cheering all around!

From that night on, Josh and Emily just kept being Josh and Emily - but with kissing. In the spring of that school year, I came down with what we affectionately refer to as, "the mono". The case was so serious that I found myself in the hospital for a night and out of school for nearly a semester. I'm not kidding. I would get so tired that I would fall asleep at 8 o'clock at night, sleep through the night, and not wake up until 10 the next morning. It was during this fiasco that Josh became more than just a boy that I really liked and really, really liked kissing. He would come to my house as often as my parents would allow (What do you MEAN he can't come over EVERY night? Can't you see that we're in LOVE?!...bless my heart) and sit with me. I would throw a pillow over on him and sleep on his lap while he watched TV. This often meant that he missed out on spending time with our other friends, and I began to see how self-sacrificing he was - how tender-hearted and compassionate he was, how much he really cared about me.

Those few months of focused, isolated together-ness might've seemed unhealthy to some - I'm pretty sure to my parents without a doubt - and I imagine in some ways they were, but they also transformed Josh into my very best friend and, I think, me into his. We were able to be ourselves with one another - to let our freak flags fly high - without fear of rejection or judgement. We laughed hard and often. We watched movies and ate dinners and (I'm slightly embarrassed to admit) fell asleep on the phone with one another.

This is the most important thing, when I start to wonder if we are really good for each other, I can remember. Our relationship was always about far more than sexual chemistry, although that would become a significant, and quite frankly, crippling issue, later in our relationship. Once, early in our marriage when I found myself sorely disappointed with what the holy grail of "I do," had handed me, a dear friend and mentor of mine listened to my long list of grievances and said, "Okay, well what DO you like about Josh?" And without having to think too long or hard about the answer I shrugged and said, "He's my very best friend." She didn't need to say much after that because to be bound to the man who has been your best friend since you were sixteen - a man who loves God and cares about you - it seems like maybe that really IS the holy grail of "I do."

So today, go ahead and do it: mentally list your grievances with your spouse. We all have them...and if you've been in it for long, grievances may not be a strong enough word. Then, after you've listed all that out, stop and consider what you DO like about your spouse. If you're going to take the time to list the rotten, it's only fair to take inventory of the redeeming, too. 

Next week come back for the break-ups. All the break-ups, y'all! And coming up on Thursday is another book review. Get you some sun and some rest and some happy this week!

Book Review: Where'd You Go Bernadette

I promised you a book review this week, and a book review you shall have!

Where'd You Go, Bernadette? made its way to my "To Read" list more than a year ago. I had heard it recommended a few times but the clencher was on The Happy Hour with Jaime Ivey podcast. She was doing an interview with Jen Hatmaker who, without hesitation, recommended this as one of her favorite books at the time. She makes me laugh so if she finds a thing entertaining, I take it seriously.

The book, particularly the first half, is primarily written in the form letters between A LOT of different people. So, it takes a little getting used to at first. I kept thinking, "Wait, who is this person again?" But Semple does a good job of keeping things interesting without overwhelming you with characters. There is an air of mystery in the plot, but nothing terribly gripping to tell you the truth. I mean you really want to know where Bernadette went, but don't go into it expecting some sort of nail-biter.

The truth is, I love a good character. I care far less about plot lines and climaxes. Give me a character I can love and relate to and believe, and I am putty in your hands. I'll read until you stop giving me words. Bernadette is a fantastic character. She's just the right amount of crazy - the amount that you are pretty sure you have within yourself, and her daughter, Bee, whose voice is the primary one in the story, is this sort of perfectly adorable, pure, and appropriately snarky fourteen year old who takes life as it comes until her mother goes missing.

It is a story about finding yourself again but doing so without abandoning what's already there. I think you'll enjoy it so very much. You can borrow my copy if you want!


Don't forget to come back on Monday for The Down and Dirty Truth about Marriage. The first kiss is on the agenda for Monday, and you will, without a doubt, enjoy that one thoroughly! See you then!

The Down and Dirty Truth about Marriage: Celebrate the Beginning

I went to high school in the late nineties. My dad has always worked in technology and computers, and at that time he owned his own company. So, we had a lot of computers at our disposal. When I was a sophomore in high school, my parents allowed me to have one in my room. Honestly, there wasn’t much to get into at that point in time. Once, I entered a chat room with other teens – I am laughing out loud writing about this – just after the Columbine shootings. (I’m not at all laughing about the Columbine shootings.) A boy – I guess he was a boy. Who really knows? – asked me where I lived and went to school. I panicked, clicked out of the chat room immediately, and sprinted to my parents bedroom, where the door was locked, which could only mean one thing – they were otherwise engaged and I was going to have to deal with scary chat room boy all on my own. I tell you this to give you an accurate picture of how very unadventurous I was and how very reasonable it was for my parents to allow me to have a computer in my room.

Except for AIM.

Ah, the glorious sound of that, “Bling.” A chat coming in, popping up on the screen from barcenaux82, suz81, or jblack83 – oh how thrilling. I would leap from my floral printed, Laura Ashley sheets into my desk chair with glee and anticipation. It was just a foreshadowing of what was to come. I chatted with people on AIM that I never would have initiated conversation with in person. Technology was already closing the accessibility gap, and also, it allowed me to carefully craft my flirty words before I delivered them. My cool factor could not be contained.

I guess it was about August of our junior year in high school when Josh and I began chatting regularly. What I know about Josh now is that he’s a friendly guy who doesn’t think much about things before he does them. He likely just saw me online and figured he’d give me a shout. We had one fun conversation in which I laughed at his goofy humor (so many LOLs) and he caught my sarcasm, and that led to another and another. I started thinking that I might really like this guy. Like, really, but I felt silly about it because he was Josh – goofy, not cool, Josh. But every time we talked, I found that he didn’t make me feel the way other boys made me feel – awkward, unsure, and not enough. When we talked, I felt at ease, free to be myself, and like I was talking to a friend – because I was.

The first dance - pre-"Josh and Emily". Bless our lumpkin hearts.

There was a back-to-school dance every year in early September. Josh asked me, and I gleefully said, “Yes.” We were on the fast track to our first real date. I just knew it. I mean, we HELD HANDS on the couch in James’ pool house. What further evidence did anyone need of our forever love?

Let’s remember that part about Josh not considering things much before he did/does them. One night after the dance I was sitting at my desk, possibly playing solitaire or something else gripping on the computer, when a “Bling” came through. I leapt into action upon seeing that it was from Josh. Before we got far into our conversation, he had conveyed that he had a new girlfriend.

I’m sorry, what?

It’s the truth. Some other girl had asked him to go out, and he’d said, “Yes.”

Who the aych was this chick? I had never even heard him mention her. She didn’t go to church with us. She was not our friend. She had no place in his life. He was very clearly already mine, thought a very disappointed me.

I need to stop here to tell you that so much about our first miscommunication points to a great many of the issues we have had about once a week since. Josh had his own life, his own world apart from me. He was president of the FCA at PHS. He played tennis and ran cross-country and dated other girls, apparently, all of which had not a thing to do with me and my life. Every piece of my life, however, was connected to him. For one, I’m a female, which means I thought and talked about boys far more than they ever thought or talked about me. It’s a sad day when you realize the magnitude of this truth. For another, most of my friends were directly connected to Josh. He consumed my thoughts and my feelings and my conversations while I only affected his while we were together – and sometimes not even then.

This is still the case. If I had learned not to take offense to it, to tell him directly what I wanted and needed sooner, if I was better at it now, gosh the things we could have avoided. Sigh. Tomorrow is another day.

Wounded, I avoided him for a week or so, but he kept “Bing-ing” me (that sounds mildly dirty and I’m getting tickled at it). He started coming to my swim meets in the afternoons. I knew – I just KNEW – he wouldn’t do that if he didn’t have feelings for me. Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. Regardless, he still had some girlfriend, which I apparently only acknowledged as partial reality. When I want something, the whole world better move outta the way because I am going after it. (Josh would probably tell you that if he’d learned THAT early on, we could’ve avoided a great many additional fights…like the one we had two nights ago.) What I wanted, friends, was Joshua Wesley Blackwell.

Within a month or so, "other girl" – who as it turns out was perfectly nice – was out of the picture and, through a great deal of finagling by my friend Susan, our first date was on the calendar. Funnily enough, my parents were out of town for this transaction. I haven’t a clue where, but I was the only person in my house that night – have I mentioned how very NOT wild I was? My friend, Kate helped me pick out my outfit: pinstripe pants and a white button up with some sort of very chunky heels. Oh that sweet, lumpkin, late nineties fashion. He took me to Logan’s where we ordered salads and my stomach hurt so bad I thought I was going to have to spend some time in the bathroom because of my nerves. We went to see The Sixth Sense, and held hands THE WHOLE TIME (surely this was a done deal). He brought me home and that was it. By mid-November, we were officially “Josh and Emily.”

There are other stories from that first year, of course – the first kiss, all the break-ups, the mono, how he literally became my very best friend in a way no one ever had before. We’ll save those for next time because they matter in our story – and they’re pretty funny, too.

How’d you end up with your person? Do you remember the subtle nuances of your start? I, for one, find myself getting all the feels about a man who is, quite frankly, still a very, very good one, despite all our differences – simply because I’m taking time to remember. So, tell us. How’d it all start for you? Tell us on the social media platform of your choosing (I'm an Instagram junkie, myself) and use the hashtag #tdadtamarriage (The Down and Dirty Truth about Marriage) so we can all follow along...and also pictures. Pretty please with the pictures! Let’s celebrate the beginning so we can gain some perspective on the right now.

Come back next Monday for the continuing saga. Same time, same place. Love y'all like crazy!

Book Review: The Road Back to You

The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile

I feel like I need to begin by saying that I find self-discovery fascinating. To understand myself better is like an exciting treasure hunt that leads me around bends and into, admittedly, some dark, frightening spots. I emerge, though, in the end with the prize of awareness, better coping mechanisms, and a clearer understanding of my strengths and weaknesses. Through the years, these have granted me the freedom to be who I am, not who I think I am supposed to be. Additionally, I prize understanding people - where they are coming from, what makes them tick, and why they behave like they do. It's the first thing I set about doing when I move to a new place. It helps me feel connected when I understand people.

This is because I am a two on the Enneagram (The Helper). For those of you who have read the book, that means I'm the most relationally driven number on the nine point circle. This is the quote that began my chapter:

I want you to be happy, but I want to be the reason. - Unknown

If you aren't looking to feel very uncomfortable in your own skin for a chapter; if conviction and facing your most hidden (to you) sin tendencies is not what you want to do, then don't read this book. If, however, you want to wade into the waters of being made more whole and more holy, while also, surprisingly, finding yourself entertained, go get this book and read it ASAP. It's easy and fun to plow through aside from the chapter that pegs you. That chapter IS prickly but also freeing. For example:

At their best, Twos are warm and generous, and at their worst they're resentful martyrs. 

Ouch. Alternatively, I discovered I'm a Two with a Three wing:

Twos with a Three wing (2w3) are more ambitious, image-conscious and competitive. Extroverted and sometimes seductive like the Three (the Performer), they are more concerned about relationships and connections than Twos with a One wing. These Twos are more confident, so they achieve more; being seen as successful is a close second to being known as loving and generous. In this space Twos with a strong self-image can shape-shift like Threes to become whatever is called for to achieve the desired result.

After a thorough and easy to read chapter on what the Enneagram is and how to read it, Cron dives into each number. He provides a list of self statements that identify the number at hand, a story or two about real life Numbers played out, the Number's biggest sin tendency, what the Number looks like in relationships, at work, and as children, and what the Number looks like with wings (or Numbers around it whose traits it takes on) then he provides positive steps toward spiritual transformation for the Number.

In the end, it's helping me dig deep in my own life to identify where I've gone wrong over and again, and how I can avoid those same pitfalls again and again. It's also helped me hone in on how God has wired me individually, in positive ways. In the end, though, I feel most excited to employ this new knowledge in relation to Josh, my kids, and the people I'm in close relationship with.

I'll leave you with this quote from the final chapter that sums up the heart behind the whole book:

The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them: we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them. - Thomas Merton

I love, loved this one. I honestly believe it is beneficial to anyone who is looking for ways to improve as a human being, friend, and/or follower of Christ. Add it to your list!

If you read the book and have trouble identifying your number, you can take the test here and it will help you narrow it down. I took the test before I read the book and it pegged me EXACTLY!

The Down and Dirty Truth about Marriage: An Introduction

Stay struck a chord. Your response was unexpected and has pushed me to move forward on a project I've been thinking about for a while. Marriage is hard. It's one of the most challenging climbs any of us will make in this life. It's chocked full of surprises, disappointments, challenges, and victories. Mostly it's just chocked full of life, and life has a way of making us forget why we said, "Yes," in the first place. 

Last night, just after dusk, I found myself driving down the streets of our neighborhood for an errand. The houses shadowed beneath vague darkness and the smell of a summer storm rolling in, I could've made the drive blind folded. And I was stirred because those streets and that neighborhood, this neighborhood where we now live with our three kids and a dog, where we find ourselves frustrated and unsure about how to best navigate life together - it's where Josh's and my story unfolded, it's where we fell in love.

In the Bible, God reveals Himself the most extravagantly through life stories - not necessarily through events and moments that seem enormous at the time, but through a steady stream of faithfulness sprawled out over a lifetime. So, I thought maybe I'd give you a peak into our story - how it's probably a lot like yours in some ways. From our dating days to that torturous first year to adventures and career changes and babies - what we've done well, and what we've done terribly - God has faithfully been writing our story, and He isn't done yet. I think maybe remembering it all will be good for me. Maybe it will be good for you, too. Maybe, just maybe, it'll help you remember and enjoy the, "Yes," that launched your own crazy, beautiful, hard, holy journey called marriage.

So, here we go:

Josh Blackwell was a boy. He was skinny with blue green eyes and a quiet smile. He was kind, humble, and a little awkward around girls. He was unassuming, not yet striking in looks, and a good, loyal friend.

We met in the hall at the church I grew up in.

I knew who his family was. Everyone knew who his family was. They were the five gorgeous, exotic missionary kids that had just returned from Brazil, where they’d grown up on the mission field. Not only were they beautiful people from a foreign land, but also they had just lost their dad in a tragic car accident. The whole youth group honestly wanted to be their friends – out of curiosity, compassion, and good old-fashioned crushes. When they walked in the doors of the sanctuary, we all stopped and stared.

He was standing, funnily enough, with my ex-boyfriend - Joe. We were fourteen – freshmen in high school – entirely awkward and very ambitious. I walked over feeling pretty good about my bright red Gap sundress decorated with giant white poppies, sweet-action rolled bangs, and shimmery pink lip-gloss. I tried not to think about my braces. I said, “Hi!” with as little awkwardness as possible since Joe and I were still navigating the waters of being “exes”. Joe quickly said in his less-than-enthusiastic-but-nice-all-the-same tone, “Hey. This is Josh. Josh, this is Emily. Josh is new here.” I confidently stuck out my hand, “Nice to meet you! I’m glad you’re here!”

And that was it. Josh quickly settled into our group of friends at church. We were together every weekend of the school year and nearly every night of the summer. We were “boyfriend and girlfriend” for a very brief five or so days during our freshman year. I can’t be sure whether it was because we were both present and available and attainable to one another or because we were genuinely into each other. Sometimes, when you’re fourteen, it really doesn’t matter. That love affair abruptly ended when he told me he loved me and put his arm around me in church after a week of dating. I ran for the hills.

Still, weekend after weekend, night after night, we were together in a group setting. I learned his personality without even realizing it was happening. I thought he was a little nerdy, said, “Yes,” out of pity when he asked me to the Mid-Winter dance our sophomore year – as though I had other options banging down my door, and firmly settled him in the "friend zone." 

The truth is, there was another boy, still navigating what it meant to be a man, who flirted skillfully but treated me terribly. He and I had a relationship not unlike many other high school relationships, in which he dictated all the terms. So, most of the time we were off-again, but while I was navigating what it meant to be a grown-up girl with standards and a will of her own, I hoped desperately that he’d want to be with me forever.

I’m so glad that never worked out.

Tune back in next Monday for the next chapter. Love y’all like crazy!

What if reading is as important as cardio?

Can I tell you the truth? I grow so weary of having my senses flooded with "eat healthier" and "exercise" and "make sure your kids are eating this and this and this but not that or that." It exhausts me. Do you know why it exhausts me? Because physical wellness is not my jam. Please don't misunderstand. I firmly believe that there is great value in staying active and making wise food choices in moderation. Firmly. But consuming a salad feels the exact same to me as eating grass out of my backyard, and I think working out is torture akin to root canals.

That's the truth.

Exercising my mind, though - ahh. There is no greater high or release for me. Give me a good book that sends me sailing through oceans I'll never see with my eyes or enlightens my mind with new thoughts and ideas, that breed my own new thoughts and ideas - that sweep me up in wonder of a God who is always more, who is in it all, who is over it all. Yes, give me that and you'll see me ride a high not unlike the one all those crazy-brained runners describe.

So, I try to respect all the "Eat good food" and "Exercise a lot" shouts and nudges that fly at me from every direction, because if it means to them what reading and learning and experiencing mean

to me, I have to consider that maybe it's all important to our big, good Father - who allows pieces of His passions to be reflected in all of His creation!

Why, though? Why is it that important?

Reading breeds compassion. We can enter worlds, cultures, and lifestyles that we would never normally come in contact with or even begin to understand otherwise. This is invaluable for us as human beings and followers of Christ.

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view." - Atticus Finch, To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

Reading breeds self-awareness. When we fill our mind with information that better helps us define who we are and what we believe as individuals, we are better able to interact with the world around us - particularly the relationships we find ourselves in. All truth is God's truth and, in my experience, reading is one of the most effective ways to explore truth.

“The truth will set you free. But not until it is finished with you.” David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest

Reading breeds rest. Reading is not unlike exercise. While you are doing it, if it is a thing you do not do regularly or do not particularly love doing, you might hate its guts. Truly - I believe you about that. I do not understand you, but I believe you. However, reading - or even listening to an audio book - forces our minds to slow, to hear/read the language, and to formulate thoughts and images of our own. It forces our brains create images and ideas that were not pre-formulated for us visually, which in time increases our ability to think creatively and engage with the world arounds us. And just like a good workout, it might help you sleep better at night.

"Reading forces you to be quiet in a world that no longer makes room for that." John Green

Reading breeds reading. The most important thing you can do to help your children become life long readers is model reading as a priority in your own life - even if reading isn't your jam like exercise isn't mine. Facebook articles and Internet scanning are the fast foods of reading, y'all. Treat them as a now and then option but not as your main method of feeding your brain and creativity! Let your kids see you reading or hear you listening to an audio book. It matters!

"A child who reads will be an adult who thinks." Anonymous

That being said, I'm on a quest this summer to do some reading like it's my glorious, make-a-million dollars job. My kids are old enough now that time is not COMPLETELY eaten up with diapers changed and sippy cups refilled and boo boos kissed. There is a little more margin, and I'm filling mine with books - in an alternating Non-Fiction/Fiction pattern. I'll be posting reviews as I finish them - hopefully every Thursday! Stop back by to find out what's great and what's good and what's probably for book-y people only - like the burpees of the workout world.

And now without further adieu, my summer reading list in chronological order. #englishmajor

Bathroom Revival

In every house we have lived in, the master bathroom has been decorated with a collection of all the things that didn't get used in the rest of the house. I have never been intentional to make it a space that invites us to relax and enjoy - that invites thought and reflection and beauty. For one, I haven't had a bathtub in quite a few houses, which is a bummer because bath time is my favorite time for thinking, pondering and reflecting.

So, when I finally got around to repainting our bathroom here, I decided that I was also going to make it fully ours - a master bath that was both practical and inviting. If I'm being real honest, this only matters to me. Josh noticed for about a day that it was pretty and now it's back to just being the place where he gets clean. I don't even care. I'm just so glad it's done!

I've learned to be a propronent of embracing what you've got. We just don't have the budget right now to tear out that vanity, replace the oh so flattering light of that flourescent baby above the sink, and ripping out the pukey green bathtub. The cabinets still need to be repainted and the light/vent in the bath area still needs to be replaced. And, quiet, frankly - we'd really just like a little bit bigger bathroom. Someday, y'all, but there's no sense in missing out on enjoying today while I'm waiting for someday. 

Good enough can be good enough!

Wall Color: Sherwin Williams Sea Salt - this is one of those chameleon colors that looks different in every light. Gray, green, and blue will all appear at different times of the day.
Vanity Area: There were already brushed copper knobs on the cabinets that are fairly new. I didn't see any sense in replacing them. They are good enough for now - and sometimes that just needs to be okay!

My side of the vanity: Josh and I have taste that is so very opposing, I generally like to create "his" and "hers" spaces, or at least touches, in our bedroom and bathroom. I wanted my side to be practical and pretty. I've always struggled to find a convenient and hidden spot for my make-up and daily self-care items. When I saw this mail organizer at Target, I thought I'd give it a try. It's perfect and cost me about $20! Always look at thing for what they could be, not what someone else decided they should be, and you'll find that sometimes you score big! Touches of greenery always make a room look intentional and alive, to me. The little fake succulents came from Target for just about $7 a piece. Hooks were on sale at Hobby Lobby for about $8 a piece, and as always, frames were about $9 a piece. I'm still deciding on what picture will make me the happiest. I spend a good amount of time in my bathroom in the mornings getting ready. The pictures I stare it have to be carefully chosen!

Josh's side of the vanity:I don't know if you can tell, but Josh's hook is actually a hand! It makes me so happy - and it even made him chuckle. Adding a little quirk and personality to your home in small details makes it feel more unique and indicative of who your family is. Don't be scurred to get a little cooky with a few items! Mrs. Meyer's soaps make everyone's hands smell spectacular and not soapy all the time, and also, they're branding is brilliant for display.

Bath area: When I tell you that our bathroom is tiny, I am not exaggerating. TI-NY. I can't even get pictures of entire walls because I can't back up far enough! We have loads of room in the rest of the house, though, so we decided to live with the smallness for a good long while. Towel hooks from Target for $18 NOT in the towel hook section. They're actually coat hooks. Again, keep your eyes pealed for things that could work for what you need - no matter how they're labeled! Using something untraditional for necessary storage needs can add so much personality to a space. Shower curtain is from Target last season. Wreath from Hobby Lobby for $20 but used my 40% coupon and got it on the cheap. Because the space is so small and pretty dark, I chose light and breezy linens (including the shower curtain) to keep from weighing down the space with patterns and colors. (Here you can get a glimpse of the deeply awful vomit-green bathtub.)

This is the area just to the left of the toilet. I needed somewhere to store the toilet paper that was easily accessible from the actual toilet. Since there is virtually no floor space, a shelf up high was my best option. Fortunately, I found this shelf on sale at Hobby Lobby for $10, and it coordinates with the wall organizer and the towel hooks. I love that toilet paper becomes part of the decor - it pulls that white across the room! Flowers from Target for $18 (my second biggest splurge, funnily enough). Those two prints were ones that I already had - on from my friend Stacey's book launch for Fresh Out of Amazing - go get a copy today and we can talk about how wonderful it was later - the other I won from the Noonday spring launch. It's by Lindsey Letters. I had not planned to use them in the bathroom, necessarily, but I need two items that were uniform in nature to group under the shelf. This is where I say again - use what you got, love what you got!

Lastly, we have the throne. Such a wonderful thing to have right by your head while you're reclining in the bathtub. Because of this issue, I felt like it was really important to aid in ambience and general smell. The tea light holder is from Target for $20, my biggest splurge, and the angel wings candle holder is from Hobby Lobby on clearance for $5. There were a few others that I liked more, but good enough for $5 won out! I opted for simple blinds instead of curtains here because I felt like extra fabric would overdo the space.

There you have it. Not a remodel - but certainly a bit of a revival. This room now makes me so very happy! I hope this encourages you to tackle one room at a time - even if it's just a tiny one to start out with - to make your house feel like your home that meets your needs and reflects who you are...this, I'm convinced, automatically makes others feel comfortable when they walk into your house! In a great many cases, use what you got, love what you got, will make all the difference. You don't have to spend hundreds of dollars to get a space you love! It just takes a little time and creativity.

Love y'all like crazy!