Fun Friend Friday: Tamara

As stated yesterday, this week's Fun Friend Friday has a twist.  The twist is that I'm writing it.  Sorry if that's disappointing ;)

I'd like to introduce you to my friend 'til the end, Tamara!  We had no idea that fateful day in the second grade when mean Mrs. Pettigrew sat me next to her that the friendship would last forever, but last it has.  Through a public vomiting experience [I was the vomiter] and an awkward junior high love/hate relationship, to Art class companions in high school and spots in each other's weddings.  And now I get to see her AT LEAST once a year because she and her hubs are obsessed with Disney World and we happen to be able to get to Disney World fairly easily :)  It works out nicely.  

Anywho....she has started an Etsy store called Two, Four, Five Designs!  And about a month ago, which would be about a month after the miscarriage, I got a package in the mail from her with a card that said something like, "I know the past several weeks haven't been very fun so here's a little goody box to make you smile."  [When I told my mom this, it melted her heart, too.]  

And smile.I.did.  Because when I opened that box, mine eyes beheld... 

Did you ever see so much fun-ness via fabric and stitches in all your life?!  And she made all of it!  So cool, right??? 

My Magnificent LOVES this owl shirt.  She asks for it every time I open her drawer by saying, "Hooo, hooo??"  Most of the time I have to tell her it's dirty because she's already worn it and this mama only does laundry once a week.  

When you live in Louisiana, fleur de lis are a dime a dozen.  When you live in any other state, they are unique and interesting and a mark of where I come from, darn it.  So I was more than thrilled to find this dish towel bearing the emblem of my homeland...with SUCH the cute fabric.  And those other two?  Let's just say Fall and Winter are gonna bring a little more fun to my kitchen :)

And then there's this baby.  This hold-everything-I-own-and-look-cute-while-doing-it piece of heaven.  I love it. Love, love it.  It has been appointed my summer purse...and where I come from summer lasts a lot longer than three months.  In this instance we are glad about that.

And although my camera focused on the wrong part, you can see the three pockets that will hold their own hosts of goodies.  Please disregard the raging mess that is the inside of my purse.

I almost forgot to show you these bad boys!!  Aren't they cute as cute can be?  They hold my lip gloss, extra snacks in case need-food-Emily-without-Jesus starts to rear her ugly head, and pens and other loose goodies that usually end up at the bottom of a bag with all the crumbs and junk.

I like 'em a lot.  Heck, I like it all a lot!  So, if you love these goodies as much as I do, head on over to Two, Four, Five Designs and find something you like.  Not all of the items displayed here are available yet.  Friends since the second grade has its perks :)  And if you want to learn more about my pal Tamara and all of her quirky fun-ness [FYI: in my book quirky is a very big compliment reserved only for the elite of my friends], head on over to her blog The Ins and Outs of our Life Together.

Fun Friend Friday: Katy

Katy Lou is a sweet friend from college who is more like a sister than a friend.  She and I rode the ride together...for better or worse...to Spain and back...experiencing things together that bind two people for life.  Katy is steady and loyal and fantastically honest.  She gets me and I get her.  No explaining required.  She is wife to one sweet Jacob and mama to Owen and Olivia.  And a Dave Ramsey fan through and through.  She is all about people living free of debt...spend ten minutes with her and you'll believe me!  She. Is. Real.  And perfectly imperfect.  And she just lost her Grandpa.  

The following post is Katy's response to that loss and it is one of the most beautiful expressions of grief I have ever read.  I sat and cried with her as I read it because I felt a part of her grief through her words.  If you've ever lost a loved one, this might be a comfort.  If you've never lost a loved one, it might give a better glimpse at the pain.  Help you feel it more with those who have.  Here's a little glimpse at the Katy that I will love for always...

I can see the things that need to be done: the pile of dirty dishes awaiting a soak in the dishwasher, the mountain of clean clothes growing so large its starting to intermingle with the dirty ones again and the bathroom...oh, the bathroom. But, doing them seems like too much right now. My mind is fuzzy, it aches...I ache. I am sad. The sting is fresh, the news still shocking- my grandpa has died.

He was 88 years old, so it seems ridiculous to say it was a shock. The shock is that my grandmother is still alive, that she has managed to outlive my healthy, vivacious grandfather. She has outlived her caretaker, her husband of 62 years who obviously meant it when he uttered the words, “in sickness and in health.” Our world has been jarred and now we have to figure out how to live in it and care for her without him.

We take comfort in the fact that his death was peaceful. There was no sickness or hospital bed or mental deterioration. There was a recliner, the morning paper and an empty coffee cup. Our only regret is my grandmother was unable to call for help, so she sat with him all day. A stroke has limited the dexterity of her fingers and her mind stays slightly foggy. She tried to call, but her attempts were frustrating and unsuccessful, so she resigned herself to sitting at the table watching out the window for someone, anyone, to return home- “It was a long day,” are the first words she utters to me. My heart breaks as I dwell on the thoughts that must have raced through her mind, the final conversations she must have had with him, sitting there all alone with her partner of 62 years who had left her for good. After many hours of waiting, my grandma finally saw my dad drive up. Shortly after that, we got the call. The next few hours were a swirl of flashing lights, tears, hugs and family.

It takes a while for them to come get my grandpa's body. At one point, the room where he lays is filled with people-stories are shared, jokes are told, tears are shed. They finally arrive and I help move my grandpa's body onto the stretcher. It's surreal and surprisingly not disturbing. He's almost too tall for the stretcher-he would have liked that. As they drive my grandfather away, my dad melts-the gravity of the loss is crushing, the sorrow palpable. My brother and I hug him and we weep together. Then he says, “Okay, let's be Norwegian.” We all laugh. He means let's dry it up and be strong-it's part of our heritage. My dad's sense of humor in this difficult time will save us. It's part of the legacy left by my grandfather, his dad, who was always witty, clever, able to lighten heavy moments.

I haven't experienced a loss like this in my adult life. I am so proud of my grandpa. He was a good man who lived life until he didn't. I don't remember hearing him complain about anything ever. He was a diligent worker and genuinely happy in whatever circumstances he found himself. I am sad for my dad and his siblings, their spouses, and, mostly, for my grandma. His absence will be more obvious to them, their world has truly been altered.

I'm finding grief is a process. Sometimes in my swirling head a thought breaks through and I feel the sting of fresh tears, the tears I thought I had already cried. I know they say time heals all wounds, but I think time will bring a downpour of reminders that Grandpa is gone. For now, I'll attempt to load my dishwasher tricking my mind into focusing on something else. It will work temporarily, but the sadness is right there below the surface of survival and denial. I know eventually the doing won't be so difficult, but right now, the shock is still new, the emotions still raw and the tears just a memory away.

If you love her like I do now, you can find her at Everyday is a Journal Page.

See y'all on Monday!

Fun Friend Friday: April

Well, the beach was a flop.  It was cold and cloudy.  But we got out and Adelle had fun playing in the sand.  Fortunately for all of us, we still get to hear from April today!

April is new[er] friend of mine that I met at church.  She is sassy and fun and I knew immediately that I wanted to be her friend!  She is a Southern country turned city girl and is rather fond of all things sparkly.  And pink.  And her sweet husband, Andy!  And April loves God's Word.  She is knowledgeable and eager to speak truth - but she never says too much.  She's not one of those overbearing truth speakers who hurts feelings in the process!  She ROCKS!  See for yourself!

WORRRRD.

Hello everyone in Down and Dirtyville. How cool is Emily’s blog?? I am honored that Emily has so bravely allowed me an opportunity to share with you.

I don’t know about any of you, but I’m totally a WORD person. Words inspire me & words encourage me.

Some of my favorite words are…

Believe.

Dream.

Aspire.

Elevate.

Exquisite.

Inspire.

Achieve.

Faith.

Sparkle.

Last but not least, the one that Emily and I have in common...

TRUTH.

(I could go on…but I’ll spare you in case you thought I was gonna go through the whole Merriam Websters.)

I have a wall hanging that says it. It’s what the Bible is. It’s what we’re told to tell instead of a lie. It hurts. It heals. It frees. It brings peace. It’s sometimes hard to accept.

All these descriptions are what I think of when I think about TRUTH but you wanna know the strangest thing I’ve discovered about TRUTH? Everyone has their own version of it. Have you ever heard the saying that there are 3 sides to every story? The one side, the other side and the truth. Well, I feel like the 3 sides of my story are usually my version, what the world tells me about my version, and Gods. Out of the three, you can probably guess the only one that really matters.

We all see things through a different filter due to how we were raised, what our beliefs are, our personal experiences and what our mindset is about the world. Half full? Half empty? Positive attitude or negative? There are SO MANY factors that determine what we each consider to be the TRUTH. And sometimes, all those factors can start making the truth look all muddy and confusing.

So, I am on my journey in life to seek out the real TRUTH. To discover who I am by daily recalibrating my heart and mind to what God tells me is the REAL TRUTH about my life and the life I can lead with victory through Christ Jesus. The REAL TRUTH about who I am is discovered through His word and His promises. Day by day, verse by verse, prayer by prayer…from glory to glory until I see His face…I seek TRUTH.

Worrrd.

Peace Out.

April

If you want to know more about the fabulous April, you can find her at A Princess Life!

Fun Friend Friday: Molly

Meet Molly.  Photographer.  Graphic Designer in training.  Wife to Sthteben.  Fiercely loyal.  Wise beyond her years.  And more fun than I feel comfortable conveying to you on this page :)  She is my sister bear and very best friend.  My favorite thing about Molly and Stephen is that they embrace life and live it right down to their toes.  They live it intentionally and joyfully.  And they are fun.  Did I say that already?  

Molly's heart is bold and passionate and entirely real.  See for yourself...  

Truths Collide

Be prepared... truths are about to collide.  Big time.

Truth:  I was created to bring glory to God.  (... for I have made them for my glory.  It was I who created them. Isaiah 43:7)

Truth:  So were you.

Truth:  I fail DAILY to do just that.  In fact, 95% of the time, I feel like I do the opposite. 

Truth:  I am a filthy sinner who needs a Savior. 

Truth:  God offers the ultimate perfect sacrifice, and we are "justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus." (Romans 3:24)

Truth:  Jesus crossed ALL barriers to reach and love people from every walk of life.  Example?  The Samaritan floozy woman at the water well, Zacchaeus, the wee little man who was a big fat tax collector that no one liked.  Mary Magdalene, the woman with 7 demons controlling her life, Martha, the over achiever who was too busy for Him, Saul aka Paul... Christian hater and killer, Judas (the betrayer),  the foreign leper, the nasty bleeding woman, Healing on the Sabbath (GASP), Peter, the denier, demon possessed men, and the list goes on and on and on and on. 

Truth:  I feel as though I could cross almost NONE of those barriers.  Example?  It would make me nervous to talk to a floozy at a water fountain about Living Water.  The IRS and government make me mad, I would fear for my life approaching a Christian Killer, It would piss me off if I knew someone was going to betray me.  If a bloody woman came and grabbed my dress, I might would be a tiny bit grossed out, I'd be really frustrated with someone denying they knew me, a demon possessed man would make me scared, and this list goes on and on and on and on. 

Truth really is Jesus crossed all barriers to reach ME.  The hardheaded, prideful, worry wart, partying, boozing, heartbreaker, broken, frail, dark, scared, too stubborn to accept grace little girl.  And he picked me up, washed me all clean, poured living water into my soul, and asked me to forget about myself and follow Him.  

Which means... it's time for me to start following Him across barriers.  Scary? Yes.  He never said it would be easy... He only said I'd never go alone.  "And be sure of this:  I am with you always, even to the end of the age."  Matt 28:20

If you love Molly's stream of consciousness, in your face style of writing as much as I do, you can find more of it at The Simple Life.

See y'all back here on Monday for our next Mayhave!  Have a great weekend!

Fun Friend Friday: Lauren

Alrighty, folks...remember how at the beginning of the week I told you that Friday's are now the day you hear from fellow Down and Dirtiers?  Friends who have a voice and a passion that is [sometimes] different than my own.  My goal is for this to be a community, our little Down and Dirty world, that is.  I think that hearing from the hearts of other women is the best way to do that.  So, without further adieu...

This week we get to hear from Lauren.  I L.O.V.E. me some Lauren.  She is a wife.  And a mama to one terribly cute, incredibly active two year old.  Lauren and I went to college together - and I liked her then - but it wasn't until our contact via social networking in the past few years that I officially decided she is a kindred spirit.  Sometimes I dream that we get to hang out in real life.  True story.  In addition to being spectacularly real, Lauren is also amazingly knowledgeable.  She's a researcher and an avid learner.  I can always count on her information to be detailed and carefully investigated.  You can find Lauren and all of her hilarious self at Over-thinking Everything.  But enough about how fun and great I think she is...see for yourself!

Deal

I have a problem.  It’s with anger.  The problem is not that I feel angry.  And the problem is not even that I act out my anger.  The problem is that anger is my idol. 

This might all make more sense if I rewind a bit.  I do not have a small, stone statue hidden in the laundry room that I bow to named “Anger.”  A very wise woman once told me that anything or anyone to whom you take your pain is your idol.  Unless, of course, you’ve managed to take your pain to God; God’s not an idol, because he IS God. 

But the rest of the recipients around us, begging us to come to them, hang with them, spend money on them, give our time to them AREN’T God.  And they can’t do a darn thing for you.  In fact, if they can convince you to bring them your pain, they’re well on their way to destroying you.  That’s what idols do.

And just in case you’re new to the realm of “Theology The Best That I Can Figure” by Lauren, I’ll rewind a bit more.   Can we all agree that life isn’t perfect?  Things just happen that aren’t good or easy or reversible.  Without assigning fault or blame to any person, just by the fact that we exist in this imperfect world, we have to learn how to “deal.”  Every person acts differently in their gut-reaction “deal” mode.  Some people stick with the toddler reaction long after it is age-appropriate (I might be “some people”).  Some people shut down, some cry out, some go for a run, some multi-task and go for a run and end up at Chili’s. 

The point being that naturally, in one way or another, we all “deal.”  The problem is, we don’t do it right.  And by “right,” I mean in a way that won’t hurt us.  To be fair, every one has to learn to deal at a young age.  It’s not really fair to condemn the coping mechanisms of a 3 month-old baby.  But there comes a time when you are confronted with some truth.  I can’t do this on my own.  I can’t “deal.” 

And at that point you have a decision to make.  You can decide to try all sorts of things to help you “deal” on your own, or you can take your pain to God.  This is where it gets a little tricky, because how it looks—what you’re actually, physically or emotionally doing—is not so much the point.  The point is that you took your pain to God.  Is that getting old?  If it is, then you must not need to hear it as often as I do. 

So, does “taking your pain to God” mean immediately reading your Bible?  Maybe.  Does it mean praying?  Sure.  Does it mean crying?  Could be.  Does it mean talking with a Christian counselor?  Sometimes.  Does it cease to resemble any of the aforementioned options?  Possibly.  It’s one of those things.  It’s real-life.  It’s a little gray. 

But if you take your pain to God--over and over and over and over again, if you refuse to heed the calls of the easier, neater, prettier, more comfortable “stress-relievers,” then slowly, sometimes imperceptibly at first, an amazing thing will happen.  You’ll begin to be healed.  Because, well, God wants to do that. 

God wants to love you.  He wants you to receive His love.  He wants to take your pain.  He wants you to sacrifice it to Him.  Pretend He IS in the laundry room—‘cause technically He is, right?  Go in there and tell Him what’s hurting.  Who did what to you?  How did it feel?  What uncontrollable scenario threatens to overwhelm you right now?  Anger might offer you a short-term break from those feelings, a satisfying moment or two—since you got your say.  But it can’t take your pain, let alone heal you. 

But God!  God, on the other hand, desperately wants to heal you; because he desperately wants a relationship with you.  Ask my husband how hard it is to have a relationship with someone who hangs out with Anger.  He’ll tell you it’s pretty near impossible.  If you’re destroyed by Anger (to whom you insist upon running) you cannot relate to God. Destroyed, semi-semblances of people do not relate well—if at all.  And relating is the verb that must be present in the noun “relationship.”  I don’t mean you can’t do things for Him or look like you know Him.  I mean you are completely unable to accept His love, grace, forgiveness, mercy, and truth.  And, if you read for a bit in His book, you’ll conclude that the sum of those things is often appropriately lumped together as the word “know.”  You can’t really, fully, life-changing-ly know God if Anger is managing your pain.  Anger will make sure of that.

God knows He’s the only one who can take our pain.  And He tells us to bring it to him.    ‘Cause He can deal.